A new university for "open inquiry" reminds us that building is better than tearing down, while a "hookup app for the emotionally mature" makes us wonder: Can pleasure really be engineered?
I love your podcasts (and I am a paid member). While I admire Megyn Kelly, esp. her professionalism and response to Trump and Ayres, I'd really like for her to lean away from the red-meat-to-base dynamic she often presents. For example, is saying that having 3 year olds wearing masks abuse accurate? I do agree that it is a net negative, but is it truly abuse? Not in my opinion, unless you want to create an emotional reaction. Likewise, I was happy initially to listen to her interview of Gavin de Becker, whose book The Gift of Fear I think is just great. But then it really turned into a long anti-vax discussion. Not my cup of tea. That said, I do think it would be fun to have a drink with her.
BTW, love "Girls Talk" as an intro. I didn't know the Edmunds take on it, only Elvis Costello's. It's now one of my 9 yo daughter's requests, along with Merle Haggard's "Mama Tried." Sure, I respect her love for Taylor Swift as well.
Thanks for the podcast. I really enjoy the conversations!
As a regular reader of the show notes, I learned I mistakenly assumed an article in the New Yorker called "The Hookup App For the Emotionally Mature" was a humor piece from the Shouts & Murmurs section.
Single women who are into couples are called unicorns because of their rarity. Especially before dating apps, the supply/demand mismatch was so extreme that finding a woman like that “out in the wild” was nearly impossible. Or so I’ve heard.
Re: Jon Stewart, I too bought into his fictional persona, not realizing that he was only the visible part of a well-oiled team. It makes me wonder about how many of Biden’s missteps are due not only to his age but also an incompetent team who have impractical ideas and don’t know how to read the room. (Or, the room they are diligently reading is like a private chamber at a club that’s reserved for VIPs).
Wow, Mike, I vaguely recall that article, which produces in my what my daughter and I call "the good ow," it hurts in a way that you want to press it because... because it's so human (no pun). Yes exactly as you say in your piece, all the advantages are the disadvantages; you cannot engineer vulnerability, some of us only want to look into the mystery
Thanks for the reply and the read! You can't engineer vulnerability - the real thing is mysterious and real and liable to be painful. Or, anything that is without the possibility of pain or loss or risk ... isn't real enough.
I agree, but having grown up going to Hebrew school, Jewish summer camp, and Jewish youth group, I totally understand how she got there. Conservative Judaism is steeped in Zionism.
I think the Fox News version of Megyn Kelly is different and profoundly less interesting than the podcast/radio version of Kelly. Like many, she’s a much more nuanced and interesting character outside of the news/entertainment industrial complex. Her ideological center is definitely to the right but she’s always felt like a rational actor to me even when I think she’s wrong.
Also it’s no surprise to me that a generation, especially my left leaning peers, who have been taught that they should never feel challenged or “unsafe” would want that in every element of their lives including the bedroom. I don’t think the folks that feel that way are the majority but a loud annoying minority who is catered to.
When I hear or read a speech that sparks something inside me, I think about readings I was assigned in college because they marked a revolutionary fork in the road of political, religious or philosophical thought that influenced the time I was living in. As I was listening to Bari’s talk last week, I wondered if it would someday be assigned to students as a pivotal piece that brought about a revolutionary change in thought and society. Like a modern day Martin Luther hanging his theses on the Wittenberg gate beginning the Protestant Reformation. Is the founding of UATX and Bari’s speech going to be taught as the refocus on truth in education, journalism, etc.
Reading Haidt sparks the same thoughts and feelings. And if I were straight, I’d be all about Haidt. When he talks, I get intellectually turned on. Ha!
15 years ago, when I dabbled briefly in the “lifestyle”, bixsexual women open to threesomes with couples were called unicorns because at that time, they were considered so difficult to find as to be mythological. While the threesome seeking apps may be new, couples or singles trying to hook up for a variety of relationships via the internet is not. There use to be one called lifestyle.com. I will say personally, the only 3some I truly enjoyed happened spontaneously with a straight couple who were good friends (alcohol might have been involved 🙂). Experimenting with couples met over the internet was more work than I cared for and unfulfilling.
Isn't the Dave Edmunds version great? So fun. I am also with you on "The Gift of Fear," which I had my daughter and her friends read at least part of at age 15. I am further FURTHER with you and not being down with everything being turned into a tribal debate xx
I love your podcasts (and I am a paid member). While I admire Megyn Kelly, esp. her professionalism and response to Trump and Ayres, I'd really like for her to lean away from the red-meat-to-base dynamic she often presents. For example, is saying that having 3 year olds wearing masks abuse accurate? I do agree that it is a net negative, but is it truly abuse? Not in my opinion, unless you want to create an emotional reaction. Likewise, I was happy initially to listen to her interview of Gavin de Becker, whose book The Gift of Fear I think is just great. But then it really turned into a long anti-vax discussion. Not my cup of tea. That said, I do think it would be fun to have a drink with her.
BTW, love "Girls Talk" as an intro. I didn't know the Edmunds take on it, only Elvis Costello's. It's now one of my 9 yo daughter's requests, along with Merle Haggard's "Mama Tried." Sure, I respect her love for Taylor Swift as well.
Thanks for the podcast. I really enjoy the conversations!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e_sob_xr4C8
Great show!
As a regular reader of the show notes, I learned I mistakenly assumed an article in the New Yorker called "The Hookup App For the Emotionally Mature" was a humor piece from the Shouts & Murmurs section.
Single women who are into couples are called unicorns because of their rarity. Especially before dating apps, the supply/demand mismatch was so extreme that finding a woman like that “out in the wild” was nearly impossible. Or so I’ve heard.
Re: Jon Stewart, I too bought into his fictional persona, not realizing that he was only the visible part of a well-oiled team. It makes me wonder about how many of Biden’s missteps are due not only to his age but also an incompetent team who have impractical ideas and don’t know how to read the room. (Or, the room they are diligently reading is like a private chamber at a club that’s reserved for VIPs).
Speaking of engineering pleasure - not sure if you have heard of "fictosexuals". Here is a NYT article that I found fascinating, it is simply a logical extension of some of what you talked about - https://www.nytimes.com/2022/04/24/business/akihiko-kondo-fictional-character-relationships.html
Intimacy without risk or possibility of failure or disappointment isn't intimacy and can't, in the end, fulfill a need for it.
I wrote something about this as well - referring to a wonderful movie "Lars and the Real Girl" which I highly recommend. Here is my piece - https://theembassy.substack.com/p/all-the-advantages-are-all-the-disadvantages
Wow, Mike, I vaguely recall that article, which produces in my what my daughter and I call "the good ow," it hurts in a way that you want to press it because... because it's so human (no pun). Yes exactly as you say in your piece, all the advantages are the disadvantages; you cannot engineer vulnerability, some of us only want to look into the mystery
Thanks for the reply and the read! You can't engineer vulnerability - the real thing is mysterious and real and liable to be painful. Or, anything that is without the possibility of pain or loss or risk ... isn't real enough.
my one critique of Bari is that she should be less of a Zionist. She denies Palestinian struggle. Just comes off as kind of a grifter
I agree, but having grown up going to Hebrew school, Jewish summer camp, and Jewish youth group, I totally understand how she got there. Conservative Judaism is steeped in Zionism.
Good point!
Nice job as always ladies.
I think the Fox News version of Megyn Kelly is different and profoundly less interesting than the podcast/radio version of Kelly. Like many, she’s a much more nuanced and interesting character outside of the news/entertainment industrial complex. Her ideological center is definitely to the right but she’s always felt like a rational actor to me even when I think she’s wrong.
Also it’s no surprise to me that a generation, especially my left leaning peers, who have been taught that they should never feel challenged or “unsafe” would want that in every element of their lives including the bedroom. I don’t think the folks that feel that way are the majority but a loud annoying minority who is catered to.
Keep ‘em coming!
When I hear or read a speech that sparks something inside me, I think about readings I was assigned in college because they marked a revolutionary fork in the road of political, religious or philosophical thought that influenced the time I was living in. As I was listening to Bari’s talk last week, I wondered if it would someday be assigned to students as a pivotal piece that brought about a revolutionary change in thought and society. Like a modern day Martin Luther hanging his theses on the Wittenberg gate beginning the Protestant Reformation. Is the founding of UATX and Bari’s speech going to be taught as the refocus on truth in education, journalism, etc.
Reading Haidt sparks the same thoughts and feelings. And if I were straight, I’d be all about Haidt. When he talks, I get intellectually turned on. Ha!
15 years ago, when I dabbled briefly in the “lifestyle”, bixsexual women open to threesomes with couples were called unicorns because at that time, they were considered so difficult to find as to be mythological. While the threesome seeking apps may be new, couples or singles trying to hook up for a variety of relationships via the internet is not. There use to be one called lifestyle.com. I will say personally, the only 3some I truly enjoyed happened spontaneously with a straight couple who were good friends (alcohol might have been involved 🙂). Experimenting with couples met over the internet was more work than I cared for and unfulfilling.
Love love love. I was a crazy Elvis C stan for years, have seen him play three times, once wound up on the bus with the band...
Hmmm - something for the pod? :D
And I hope it was the drummer :D
Isn't the Dave Edmunds version great? So fun. I am also with you on "The Gift of Fear," which I had my daughter and her friends read at least part of at age 15. I am further FURTHER with you and not being down with everything being turned into a tribal debate xx
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Y71iDvCYXA
Not wrong!
yes yes yes